Yes, Feminism. It's on my mind because I've been made to defend my self-identification as a Feminist a lot lately. Well, actually the question is always why I chose to attend a women's college. But, it boils down to a defense of the Feminists' idea of how young women should percieve themselves and their place in this world, and how the reality increasingly falls short of the ideal. We're suprised to learn that young women might still need strong role models and a place of their own at that very crucial time in their lives when they will discover who they are and who they might want to be; that pop-culture, mass media, and even our education system does not empower young women, and that young women continue to undervalue their own worth as professionals and intellectuals, as contributors to society.
In the last ten days I have been asked three times why I chose to attend a women's college: what benefits would that bring in today's world; don't women emerge from these antiquated and artificial worlds unable to adjust well to the real world that is, in fact, co-ed; and, why would smart, well-adjusted and beautiful women choose to take four years out of the dating game? Incidentally, my interrogators thus far, have all been men. Which leads me to ask why men are having trouble with the idea that women might actually choose to separate themselves from the world where men also exist, to focus on themselves. Their ideas, their careers, their lives - sans men. This would not be a question posed to a man in his early or even late-twenties, if he claimed he wanted to only focus on his career for a little while.
In the last few months I have repeatedly posed this question to myself, and, at times, to my friends: where have all the feminists gone? Why aren't there more women (and men) concerned about the superficiality of contemporary teen and college culture? Why can't I find committed feminists even in the halls of those celebrated women's colleges that have, historically, been the stronghold of Feminism? Why, decades after "Second Wave Feminism", are young girls still more obsessed with their image than with career aspirations; why do they spend more time thinking about what the boys might think, and not enough about who they are, who they might want to be, and how to get there? Why do young women still lack strong role models: why are superficial and apparently inane women celebrated on TV, while strong women are continually portrayed as cold and heartless, calculating, bitchy and emasculating? Admittedly, the lack of positive role models is not just a problem for women, but for society at large - but, given that women have decades of "catching-up" still to do, this is particularly detrimental for young girls. And, while I'm ranting, why do women in the 21st century still feel pressure to choose between a high-stakes professional career and family, while men rarely face that dilemma, and, moreover, often deny that women have to. Given that conundrum, there are few men that I have met who would put their careers on hold for a few years to raise young families; that women have to continues to go unchallenged. Feminism has much left to fight for.
This brings me to my original question: where have all the feminists gone? Here I thought I was posing that question in isolation. Fortunately, I was wrong. Last month Maureen Dowd released her latest book "Are Men Necessary? When Sexes Collide" This is a call to feminists in the grand tradition of "The Feminine Mystique." It is not a treatise so much as it is a profound and incisive comment on the state of feminism, and gender relations today. Dowd does Gloria and Betty proud. She actually answers the title question early on: men are, in fact, necessary. They need not worry. Dowd astutely and amusingly chronicles her own experience as a career woman and a feminist (old-style!): the challenges of modern dating, the choices between career and family, the failure of feminism at the top (a la Hilary and Condi Rice), genetics, barbies, botox and politics. Women, she claims, are willingly turning into the Stepford Wives, and men are helping rather enthusiastically. This, perhaps, is the central point of the book. I can't recount Dowd and do her justice. I will say: if there is one book to go out and read, for men and women alike, this is it. Do not be afraid of the title. The book has much more to do with the state of contemporary feminism and the prevalent mediocrity of pop-culture that is damaging to women and men alike, than with any stereo-typical "man-hating" that feminists are often charged with. Enough said. Go out and buy it!
